SOCIAL MEDIA – It’s a minefield

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Everyone has an opinion, some will try and overpower you with it, some will be a little more subtle. And there are those that will keep it to themselves.  Opinions are just that, and the old adage that there are 3 sides to every story is closer to reality. I say 3 sides to a story, and they consist of

  • your side,
  • their side,
  • and the truth.

That’s not to say everyone is a liar, however, if we are all totally honest, there will be things that sometimes will be either omitted or changed ever so slightly.

With the explosion of social media, these opinions, and stories are now readily available to share and readily available for all to see. Even so-called ‘private’ groups will potentially have the odd spy. So what do you do for the best if you are one of the people who like to voice your opinion, or tell a story if you are involved in any issues concerning your children?

 

YOU LYING #@/$ !!!

  Now here lies a massive problem. What is the best thing to do when your ex is one of those who love to voice their opinion or tell a story, which is totally filled with lies and exaggeration? If you respond in kind, you’re probably walking into the trap, and if you say nothing, does it give the impression that what is being said about you is true.

Does it really matter what people think? Probably not, but you’ve put up with enough so isn’t it time to stand up for yourself?

This problem can cause emotions to spill over, and it’s probably best to stop and think. It is being well documented these days about the consequences of posting on social media.

Pitfalls of venting online

There is always someone looking at your accounts if you are in dispute with anyone. Will retaliation simply be walking into the trap?

 

Social media and divorce

Making yourself feel better can have repercussions that you wouldn’t think were possible. A lot of social media is portraying an image of yourself.

Young people and social media

Bear in mind that at the centre of all this are the children. Social media has its own separate issues for children, so do they really need their parents, or any member of the family causing any more stress than they are probably already feeling.

Back when I was in school, it was very unusual for a child’s parents to be separated or divorced, not so these days. But still, if the main focus is wanting your children, doesn’t that include doing what’s best for them at all times?

Approximately 50% American children will witness the breakup of a parent’s marriage. Of these, close to half will also see the breakup of a parent’s second marriage.

It’s not unusual for relationships to come to an end, and indeed staying together ‘for the kids’ will have its own complications. And there are a small number of cases where parents and step-parents get along very well.

Take this example from The Huffington Post

Candice and Ashley: 

In last year’s viral blog “An Open Letter To My Daughter’s Stepmom,” writer Candice Curry confessed she didn’t want to like whoever ended up with her ex-husband. But when she met Ashley, the woman who would become his wife and the stepmom to her daughter Stiles, it was damn near impossible to dislike the woman.

“Ashley was so respectful of my place as mom and from day one, she treated my daughter like she was her own,” Curry told The Huffington Post recently. “I’m so thankful that she’s in our daughter’s life.”

Candice Curry

Ashley and Curry’s daughter Stiles

Today, Curry firmly believes that the friendship has made her daughter’s family life less splintered, while teaching the teen that love can survive any circumstance.

“We all wanted to allow our daughter to have all four of her parents together for birthdays and school events and to never make her uncomfortable about the situation that we put her in,” she said. “It was not her choice to have divorced parents — it’s our responsibility to do it in a way that is easiest and most beneficial to her.”

Pretty awesome right …

For those not blessed to be in that situation, maybe bear in mind the sentence above in bold. The responsibility to your child is paramount. So when you are about to explode on social media, and vent all the frustrations and anger and tell everyone how sh*t you are being treated ….. stop …. take a breath, and remember your children. Remember that they don’t know a world without social media. Hell, they can use an iPad before they can walk these days, so to them, that is communication.  Rightly or wrongly, that is the reality today, and this time it’s us who need to adjust.

 

 

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1 Reply to “SOCIAL MEDIA – It’s a minefield”

  1. I agree absolutely. I don’t know why I feel I have to explain myself except for my ex had giving everybody a totally false story about me and our marriage and my qualities as a wife and mother Nobody knows the truth or they hell and torture I went through with that man. I have beat myself up for years and then myself a lot of distraction because of the mental and physical abuse and alienation then I went through because of him.

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